GROWING UP IS HARD TO DO"
by D. M. Larson
(Someone is under a bedroom sheet. He peeks out nervously. He is in pajamas. The sillier the print on the sheet and pajamas the better)
THAD
I feel so strange tonight, waking up in the full moon's light. Something had changed. I am not the same. I'm getting really hairy. More hairy than I thought a man could be. This is rather scary and ...and....my voice is changing toooooo.
(He howls and then slaps his hands over his mouth)
THAD (CONT.)
Was that a howl? And my hands... Look at my nails... did I forget to cut them or are they longer... And sharper than before?
(He struggles with the sheet.... He gets all wrapped up in a panic. He claws and rips at it)
THAD (CONT.)
Claws! Actual claws!
(He finally gets free of the sheet)
THAD (CONT.)
Mirror? Where's a mirrorrrrrr!
(Big growl)
THAD (CONT.)
Was that a growl? From my stomach? What's there to eat? I could really use some meat.
(Holds his stomach)
THAD (CONT.)
Growing up is so hard to do...
(Reaches back And feels something bulging at his rear)
THAD (CONT.)
....especially when you're growing a tail toooooooo!
(He howls and holds his bottom and carefully scoots off stage)